tips for winter driving.

[joe f]

With winter approaching here is advice for driving in icy conditions

WOMEN
1, Sit in the car with the engine running and the heater on full for 15-20 minutes until the windscreen is completely clear.
2. Pull away nervously, screaming every time the wheels lose traction, sit as close to the steering wheel as posible and try to fight back the tears.
3. When reachng a gritted road continue to drive at no more than 11mph, preferably in 4th gear so that the car lurches everywhere.
4. Arrive at work leaving the car wherever it stops, enter the office and cry with other female colleagues about how frightening the journey was.

MEN
1. Start the car, scrape off the ice with a CD cover so that there is a 6 inch hole in the ice.
2. Accelerate wildly in an attempt to get the speedo reading 90mph while still at a walking pace.
3. When joiing a vaguely gritted road drive as normal, weaving around any women travelling at 11mph.
4 Wind the driver's window down and turn the heater up to full to carry out an experiment as to whether wind chill can be beaten by the heater matrix.
5. Arrive at the work carpark at a much higher speed than usual to enable a high speed handbrake turn. If possible blow the horn to alert other men to your feat of machismo.
6. Realise that you were going to fast for the conditions.
7. Exit the vehicle and inspect damage to your car, other cars you have collided with as well as damage to curbs/bollards/bystanders.

[widowmaker]

True that pretty much sums me up

[HONDAB88]

[walsh123]

[Oldskool J-EDM]

[9000rpm!!]

2. Accelerate wildly in an attempt to get the speedo reading 90mph while still at a walking pace.

[WELLZ]

5. Arrive at the work carpark at a much higher speed than usual to enable a high speed handbrake turn. If possible blow the horn to alert other men to your feat of machismo.

How many times have a done that in the work van!

[gwenge]

and I thought this was going to sensible. Great

[vibe85]

and I thought this was going to sensible. Great

Me too.

Properly funny.

Chuckling to myself at this.

[91Hatch]

LOL sickipedia's finest!

[mattj]

I tried handbraking into the car park whilst blowing the horn (dixie horn) to alert the other of my macho achievement. All went well except the fact i'd arrived an hour later for work due to traffic and everyone had already left.

[166bhp]

lol thats top drawer!

[EF_Russ]

Quality